Hippie bus in Amsterdam
My body shows more and more signs of decay: weight loss, itching, aches and pains everywhere, anxiety and depression. In my sleep, a phantom often appears, coming closer each time. I wake up with enormous anxiety and hardly dare go back to sleep. My world gets smaller every day. Am I going mad?
Meanwhile, the ‘Flower Power movement’ is flourishing in the world. The hippies — idealistic young people who want to improve the world and live freely without the constraints of bourgeois society — are taking over Amsterdam while I am stuck in the Frisian countryside.
Searching for truth and longing for freedom, I marry at barely eighteen. For a while, I seem to be in paradise until I get pregnant, when love fades and jealousy of the yet to be born baby sets in. This relationship proves to be an unhappy one and I desperately search for a solution. At that time, divorce was illegal and only thirty years later am I finally able to break the marital hypnosis definitively and lovingly. That’s the moment when I start to feel truly free for the very first time!
Yet the question of the truth continues to haunt me…